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Your Dumbest Theory


scott-martin

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Now this is the stuff!

6 minutes ago, Qizilbashwoman said:

*ahem* They still lay eggs

There are riding animals that bear live young but they are less true horses than a grotesque lexical error concocted at great magical expense in the far west. Many "horses" you encounter in this fallen modern age are sadly of this type.

And there were once other animals who occupied a similar niche in the six-legged south but they wandered off for some reason. Maybe we'll see them again.

singer sing me a given

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6 hours ago, Akhôrahil said:

Little wonder the Praxians think they're freakish!

Maybe zebras don't, which is why they're alright?

If Praxians think that laying eggs is freakish, why do they tolerate Ostrich riders and Bolo riders? (lizards, not tanks)

 

Does painting stripes on your horse to make it pass as a zebra actually make it into an infertile cavalry zebra?

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Telling how it is excessive verbis

 

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12 hours ago, Joerg said:

If Praxians think that laying eggs is freakish, why do they tolerate Ostrich riders and Bolo riders? (lizards, not tanks)

Ostrich and Bolo lizards aren't mammals...

12 hours ago, Joerg said:

Does painting stripes on your horse to make it pass as a zebra actually make it into an infertile cavalry zebra?

I'm sorry, but the tail would give it away. Zebra have tails closer related to donkeys -- narrow short-hair but long, with a tuft near the end. Horse tails have long hairs, but underneath are quite short.

Hmmm, are zonkeys fertile?

 

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Argrath split himself into seven parts (or was split: there was a dragonnewt with a very sharp edge involved) in order to be able to carry out the dread task his inscrutable masters laid upon him: to end the Third Age with the death of the Gods. 

The parts reassembled after he had become Prince of Sartar and King of Dragon Pass. Not all of them survived. 

I wrote some poems back in the 80s/90s about this: called Rejected Notes From The Composite History they went on the old mailing list and one of them THE WOLFRUNNER'S SONG was published in TRADETALK. 

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On 6/29/2021 at 9:59 AM, MOB said:

Re the Windstop aka The Great Winter.

To survive, people right across that 250km circle afflicted took to heroquesting to try to break the Great Winter. Serendipitously – regardless of the paths taken, powers sought, or gods invoked – all the successful heroquest attempts culminated on Clay/Disorder/Earth 1622, the same day as the Battle of Iceland in Sartar. 'I Fought We Won' and all that...

 

Umm, Ok.
Crazy!
;)

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Belintar was a time traveller from the bleak future of the time of writing KING OF SARTAR. One of his names was 'the Harshax' which is all the proof I needed. (I believed it before I read that.) This may or may not tie in with the truly loopy theory some people have that dragons are moving in the opposite time direction to everyone else. 

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43 minutes ago, Michael Cule said:

Belintar was a time traveller from the bleak future of the time of writing KING OF SARTAR. One of his names was 'the Harshax' which is all the proof I needed. (I believed it before I read that.) This may or may not tie in with the truly loopy theory some people have that dragons are moving in the opposite time direction to everyone else. 

Hitched a ride on a dragon through time sounds amazing.

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Belintars story is a twisted (and gender swapped) version of "The Little Mermaid". 

Belintar lived in the ocean as a merman, as an aprentice/assistant of a powerful sea witch. The sea witch wanted to unite the merman tribes, so that they would become one big merman nation, but she wasn´t successful. 
During his training with the witch and studying the human artifacts that cover the sea floor (God Learner remains from Slontos?) he got illuminated, something the sea witch unsuccessfully approached for herself since ages. 

He traded his knowledge of how he had become illuminated to the witch for getting legs and becoming a land dweller. 

No longer seeing his merfolk as superior to the human race Belintar swam ashore what would become his Holy Country and united the local human populations into one kingdom. 
 

Edited by AndreJarosch
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On 7/5/2021 at 3:02 PM, AndreJarosch said:

Belintars story is a twisted (and gender swapped) version of "The Little Mermaid". 

Belintar lived in the ocean as a merman, as an aprentice/assistant of a powerful sea witch. The sea witch wanted to unite the merman tribes, so that they would become one big merman nation, but she wasn´t successful. 
During his training with the witch and studying the human artifacts that cover the sea floor (God Learner remains from Slontos?) he got illuminated, something the sea witch unsuccessfully approached for herself since ages. 

He traded his knowledge of how he had become illuminated to the witch for getting legs and becoming a land dweller. 

No longer seeing his merfolk as superior to the human race Belintar swam ashore what would become his Holy Country and united the local human populations into one kingdom. 
 

this is canon now

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On 7/4/2021 at 11:59 PM, Sir_Godspeed said:

Hitched a ride on a dragon through time sounds amazing.

Which explains why he looked a little queasy as he marched up out of the sea to his destiny.

Incidentally, in my Glorantha it was Belintar that Kallyr was trying to bring back when she attempted the Short Lightbringer's Quest. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Then masks and more masks, the story rumbles and changes thanks to the point of view of the winners,

So like I said a while ago gods and heroes are obviously lost or confused.

So today I present to you my new change in history, Ulanin The Rider, husband of Orgorvale Summer, is not very well known other than for this. But I say that his old name was very well known, at a certain period he was known as Hyalor The First Rider. Once a mortal man and ancestor of the Hyalorings.

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