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RHW

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Posts posted by RHW

  1. Broobiter: An especially dumb and/or fanatical Uroxi. Any Uroxi, really.

    Kot's Balls: Hendreiki curse (canonical)

    The Reds or the Redcloaks: Lunar Occupation Forces in Sartar. 

    The Red Zone: The Lunar District of Boldhome

    Trollpokers: Sun Dome Templars

    Vinga's Prick: Sartarite curse.

    Heler's Mouth: Sartarite curse

    Go to Apple Lane: Have sex.

    Chase the Wind: Run off the join the rebellion.

    'Newts or 'Newty: Crazy. 

    A trollkin's chance: Nearly impossible. No chance at all, really.

    Off to the West: Dead

     

     

    • Like 4
  2. A FRAGMENT FOUND IN THE NEW PAVIS LIBRARY (Date and author unknown)

    Argrath and Elusu prepare for a battle: 

    ELUSU: Wa, Chief. What is the sound of a sword?

    ARGRATH: A metallic ping. A whoosh of wind as it swings through the air. A meaty crunch as it slices flesh and bone.

    Elusu shakes her head. No.

    Later, after the battle, women weep and the wounded scream in pain.

    ARGRATH: That is the sound of a sword.

    ELUSU: Ain’t it beautiful?

    ____________________________

    Elusu and Argrath are deep in their cups:

    ELUSU: Look into the ale, Boss. Watch that bubble, rising. What do you see?

    ARGRATH: The World.

    ELUSU: Pop. Now it’s gone.

    ARGRATH: But look, another rises to take its place.

    Elusu chugs the beer then burps loudly.

    ELUSU: So die a thousand worlds. (Calls to the barkeep) More beer!

    ____________________________

    Elusu and Argrath walk down a dusty road on a beautiful day.

    ELUSU: I am the blow that cannot be parried. I strike you dead, but you’re alone. What am I?

    ARGRATH: Suicide.

    ____________________________

    Elusu takes a hit of hazia. Passes the pipe to Argrath.

    ELUSU: Imagine perfect Law. Perfect Order. Everything is the same. All is at rest. Nothing changes. As it was before creation. What else do we call this?

    ARGRATH: Primal Chaos.

    ELUSU: And what then causes creation?

    ARGRATH: More Chaos.

    ELUSU: Wa! Stop hogging the pipe!

    ____________________________ 

    Argrath and Elusu ride a boat downstream on the River of Cradles.

    ELUSU: What color is the sky?

    ARGRATH: Today? Blue.

    ELUSU: What color would the sky be if I scooped out your eyes?

    ARGRATH: If you put out my eyes, I won’t be able to see it.

    ELUSU: But I'll still see it.

    ARGARTH: No. Because if you put out my eyes, you’ll be dead.

    ELUSU: Wa, if I’m dead and you’re blind, then what color is the sky?

    ARGRATH: There is no sky.

    ____________________________ 

    Elusu and Argrath are at a tavern.

    ELUSU: Wa, Chief, what is this gold coin worth?

    ARGRATH: Twenty silvers. So… 200 horns of beer?

    Elusu and Argrath are lost and dying of thirst in the Wastelands.

    ELUSU: Wa, what is this gold coin worth now?

    ARGRATH: Nothing.

    Nearly dead, Elusu and Argrath reach an oasis. There are several Rhino Riders there.

    ELUSU: Now what is that gold coin worth?

    ARGRATH: If we’re lucky, both our lives.

    Argrath and Elusu loot the dead bodies of the Rhino Riders. Elusu finds another gold coin.

    ELUSU: Wa, no wonder. They already had a gold coin. What do you think it’s worth?

    ARGRATH: Everything. And nothing.

    ELUSU: Right now, I would trade it for a beer.

    ____________________________ 

    Argrath and Elusu reach a fork in the road.

    ELUSU: We're lost. We don’t even have a destination. Which is the correct way?

    Argrath continues straight, taking neither road. Elusu follows.

    ELUSU: At the end of this road, there'd better be beer.

    • Like 28
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