renaissance I do my little turn on the catwalk...

[Nozbat]

Mathias de Kveelder is a Journeyman Salt Merchant from Lüneburg and yet here he was, in the Royal Castle at Falsterbo in Skåne, fitted out in the latest Danish fashion walking up and down (and sometimes around) for the benefit of minor Danish, and possibly Swedish, nobles pretending to be a Cloth Merchant.

The de Kveelder brothers had been tasked by the Lübeck Council with finding out as much information about Brannt von Sennheim as he was the prime suspect in the murder of Meister Memminger, a Master Salt Merchant. A secondary task was to kidnap von Sennheim and bring him back to Lübeck for trial. A slightly complicating fact was that von Sennheim was King Christian II's Governor of Skåne province and a close confederate of the de facto ruler of Sweden, Archbishop Slagheck.  

They set a watch on Falsterbo Castle, the official residence of the Governor. Malicious Lingering, an indictable offence in the Empire, did not seem to carry much weight in the Kingdom of Denmark, neither as a tool for being arrested and thus gaining entry to the castle, nor in its primary function of information gathering. The only thing they had been able to confirm was that von Sennheim regularly had his Samogitian Guards carry out summary justice on people that irritated him as he rode through the town on business. But this was old news, they already knew von Sennheim had a penchant for over the top punishment from the Baker's Apprentices. The conclusion was that von Sennheim was not a nice person and his Easterling Guard were all sadists.

The cover story for being in Falsterbo was to be Cloth Merchants seeking a Local Agent for import and distribution of fine quality cloth. Judicious enquiries and some hard work had identified Nils Henningsson as a possible collaborator but negotiations were put on hold until sample fabrics arrived from Lübeck. Jürgen de Kveelder was pessimistic about setting up any deals as the whole of Falsterbo stank of herring. Any cloth would have to be sold locally as the smell of fish permeated everything. Even the cod smelt of herring.

Nils proved to be a good choice. He was dynamic and inventive and armed with the newly arrived cloth samples, he negotiated a meeting with the local nobility who helped run the King's administration of Skåne and particularly the annual Skåne Fair Fish market. Employing a local tailor, Nils convinced Mathias to model for the nobles as he had a fine turn of leg. It should be noted, that at this time, Denmark, and particularly Skåne, are backwaters and sartorial elegance is lagging by about four years. The current fashions in the Empire are shorter doublets and stripped hose that allow for a more daring codpiece. Sadly, for Mathias, his fine suit of clothing had a demure knee length doublet, which felt dated. Arguments about introducing new styles were over-ruled by Nils who pulled rank in that he knew the local market better than they did. He felt it was opportune to inform the three brothers that their 'modish' pointed shoes were the source of much merriment and jest amongst the other traders at St Gertrude's Kirche and they need to rely on his knowledge rather than for the endeavour to fall flat before it had taken off.

So it came to pass, Mathias is walking up and down humming a tune and some lyrics about being 'too sexy for my shirt' while a gaggle of intrigued minor nobility, led by the rotund Chief Administrator, Calle Hopp, a man who is a complete stranger dental hygiene, placed orders with the increasingly happy Nils Henningsson. Jürgen and Hans were working the room well, gathering tit bits of information about the 'boss', von Sennheim. 

Everything was going swimmingly, when suddenly Hopp stopped mid-sentence as von Sennheim swept into the foyer and came over to the antechamber were the crowd was gathered. If, like me, you need some visual help in imagining the scene, then think Darth Vader's entrance in the original Star Wars, all swirling black cape and minions pressing themselves against walls trying to be small and unnoticeable. The Easterlings are the Stormtroopers, but of the more competent variety.

Hopp, sweating profusely, reminded the brothers not to look at von Sennheim's face unless they were addressed directly on pain of a summary whipping. Everyone stood and waited like naughty children, eyes averted. Von Sennheim stopped before Mathias and fingered the cloth. "Does  this come in black?" he said. Mathias looked up and straight into von Sennheim's black eye. The one that appeared to have no iris. His consciousness swam and it felt that he was being sucked into an abyss. With a concerted effort, Mathias managed to drag his sight back to von Sennheim's hand, rather than the face. It was the black hand, the one that they had been told by the Merchants had been scorched by a demon he had summoned. Mathias shuddered and almost vomited. "It can be done in black, my Lord" he managed to reply. "Excellent," said von Sennheim, "but how soon?" "Six weeks, my Lord." "Hmmm, make it four weeks, on pain of retribution," von Sennheim grunted as he strode off followed by the Easterlings.

Jürgen rushed over to Mathias, steadying him as he tottered. "Don't you know," he said, "Black dye is really hard to fix, you should have asked for longer." Mathias gave his older brother a hard look. "Funny", he said, "the thought never crossed my mind during the exchange."

The moral of the story is that it would seem to be a bit of a long-shot to kidnap von Sennheim. Another plan might be needed.

On the other hand, importing cloth at 3 shillings per yard, selling it for 4/3 shillings and even making it into the finished garments at 40 shillings could be a way to become very rich. If only Falsterbo didn't stink so much of fish.