One thing I wonder about is how often the formal invocations of hospitality are brought out. Presumably you get more formal the more unfamiliar and fraught the situation is? But at the same time, I have a hard time imagining it happens every time, like the sixth time people from the friendly neighboring clan comes over.
Hospitality is definitely strong for role-playing, though. My PCs were in a situation where they had to receive an emissary from Ralzakark, and neither wanted to offend nor get too deep into the hospitality. They ended up serving exceptional ale and a lavish fish dish, in order to formally stay away from "meat". As well as trying to counter what they (correctly) felt was excessive gift-giving that would land them in a position of gratitude they didn't want.