Taunts!

[Ochoa]

Hello folks!

I've come to the conclusion that the taunts I came up with last session, where my lunar baddies tried to rattle the PCs, lacked flavor.

Does anyone have any interesting/fun taunts that will both make my table laugh and give me the tool to leverage passions etc?

Thank you!

[Bill the barbarian]

2 hours ago, Ochoa said:

I've come to the conclusion that the taunts I came up with last session, where my lunar baddies tried to rattle the PCs, lacked flavor.

Quote

 

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries now go away or I will taunt you one more time.

the pythons...

 

I know, this has nothing to do with nothing, so why? '
Cause someone had to...

but for more info, why?

Because:

The "hamster" reference is a Gallic taunt regarding the famed overbites of English beauties, Ygraine in the particular, who could blow out a candle while facing forward by leaning over it and exhaling straight down.. 

The "elderberries" is a sneer about English distillers, who for centuries made inferior gin by using elderberries instead of juniper berries. Uther Pendragon was a notable imbiber.

according to the 'net...

Edited August 28, 2019 by Bill the barbarian

[g33k]

2 hours ago, Ochoa said:

Hello folks!

I've come to the conclusion that the taunts I came up with last session, where my lunar baddies tried to rattle the PCs, lacked flavor.

Does anyone have any interesting/fun taunts that will both make my table laugh and give me the tool to leverage passions etc?

Thank you!

For a taunt to be effective, it's got to be something the recipient will take personally, y'know?  Me, I'm not sufficiently into ANY sport to throw a punch over it... or do much more than shrug, really.   Other people seem to be.

So we'd likely need to know about the PC's & their Passions, cultures, etc.  And backgrounds from character-creation:  Just because it doesn't show on "Passions" doesn't mean it won't get your blood boiling.  You got some Honor and an heirloom blade from your war-hero father, Hendrik... and some Lunar buffoon says,

Quote

You're from the Varmandi clan???  Varmandi?  My ol' da still gets a round in the pub telling about the time he found Hendrik of the Varmandi hiding in a barn after a battle, he'd wet his trousers!" (all the Lunars laugh -- one adds "Yeah, I've stood him a round m'self!")

That's likely to get a rise... but only for someone with the right Background out of character-generation.

Etc...

 

[Ochoa]

Exactly, g33k, this is what i'm aiming for!

[Byll]

Alternatively the opposite "we can't be bothered to insult you properly" approach can work. e.g. call someone a stack packer or stork porker instead of a stick picker and and just shrug whatever if they get uptight about it.

[Ian Absentia]

I remember getting pretty badly miffed by a bunch of trollkin who once told our party to "eat ****, ***holes!"  I mean, how high-brow do you want to take this?  As @g33k suggests above, it's often a matter of who's saying it to whom, and not so much a matter of what they say.

!i!

[Bill the barbarian]

A small sampling from   at https://www.nosweatshakespeare.com/resources/shakespeare-insults/

 

Quote

 

From the Top 50 Shakespeare Insults:

34. “Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog!”
Richard III (Act 1, Scene 3 )

33. “Thou damned and luxurious mountain goat.”
Henry V (Act 4, Scene 4)

22. “That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?”
Henry IV Part 1 (Act 2, Scene 4)

6. “His wit’s as thick as a Tewkesbury mustard.”
Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 4)

Number Two

2. “Away, you starvelling, you elf-skin, you dried neat’s-tongue, bull’s-pizzle, you stock-fish!”
Henry IV Part I (Act 2, Scene 4)

And Number One

1. “A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.”
All’s Well That Ends Well (Act 3, Scene 6

 

 As per the conversation above, the insult must match the victims, I can't see number 1 bothering a Eurmali. While I think what sounds tame might really piss off a chaos hating heortlander; number 33..

Cheers

PS check out the insult generator on that page as well.

Edited August 28, 2019 by Bill the barbarian

[g33k]

And the players can return -- "Remember, lads -- when we loot these stupid Lunars after the fight, leave the beer.  The Lunars stretch their salary by cutting their beer with Broo-piss."

 

[Lordabdul]

"Colymar Tribe? Huh.... I heard all they have in the Colymar Tribe are morons and cows. And you lot don't look like cows!"

[Austin]

"You barbarians can't tell the difference between a cow and a woman!" Or a bull and a man, as best fits.

Or maybe goat instead; goats are verboten to eat for most RQG cultures if I remember the Equipment & Wealth chapter correctly.

[Akhôrahil]

"Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, fuck thy mother.

Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!

So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!

- Koshovyi otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host"

[Bill the barbarian]

8 minutes ago, Akhôrahil said:

"Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

<snip>

Yeah, but how did he really feel?

Edited August 29, 2019 by Bill the barbarian

[jajagappa]

5 hours ago, Crel said:

goats are verboten to eat for most RQG cultures

For most Dragon Pass Orlanthi. It's not a universal thing.

That said, Lunars in these lands might well reference the locals as: "goat lovers", "broo-spawn", etc.

[Sumath]

Ancestor worship? You ought to be blaming them for the state of your face.

By the looks of you, your mother and father were siblings.

Begone, foul spawn of chaos... oh, sorry, it's just Korvan... those eyes and nostrils always look so similar.

Grey Dogs! If only you were half as smart as a mongrel then we could put you to work, pissing on the crops.

Are you part troll? Because it looks as if the kin curse has affected your family.

I'd heard you Sartarites worshipped the wind - I just didn't realise you had it blowing between your ears as well.

I'm not sure which Lunars are ugliest - you lot, or the ones that dragon is still picking out of its teeth. 

*Nodding towards herd/flock*: I didn't know you were bringing your family with you.

How do, you put up with the smell of that awful beast? No, no, I was talking to the bison.

You call this wine? It tastes like your mother's bathwater.

Gah! Your breath is worse than the Crimson Bat's!

Say, that's a big spear - over-compensating for something, are you?

Raise a spirit? Your husband says you haven't made anything rise in years!

Rumour has it that you're hung like a trollkin.

Hah! Just look at those tattoos! Perhaps you should ask a grown-up to help you with those next time...

Your reputation precedes you, how wonderful to finally meet this sycophant everyone keeps referring to.

Well, they said we would have to face their best fighters, but it looks like they've sent a carnival to entertain us instead.

 

[jajagappa]

1 hour ago, Sumath said:

I'd heard you Sartarites worshipped the wind - I just didn't realise you had it blowing between your ears as well.

Or perhaps "blowing out your @#$!"

[Bill the barbarian]

I was at the Rebellion of the Righteous Wind back in '11. Well, there was wind alright, but righteous? I would say more foul. Surprised ya could smell that above those horse barbarians (which smelt worse, the horse of the barbarian?). And they say they hate chaos!
Ah you should have see the crucifixes all along the Pavis Road, now  that was righteous.

If this doesn't get their (if you will pardon the expression) goat, then that is one tolerant laid back Heortlander.

Cheers

[soltakss]

The best insult I ever heard was from the Alien Nation film, "Your mother mates out of season".