Your Dumbest Theory

[Sir_Godspeed]

17 minutes ago, Nevermet said:

All I'm saying is that if you haven't tried Kaxtor's Fried Chicken, you haven't lived.

The secret ingredient is Iron Vrok.

[Nevermet]

After its been beaten against a wall for a few years.  

[MOB]

11 hours ago, jajagappa said:

The trolls are outraged!  How can anyone overlook the #1 chain throughout Dragon Pass, and beyond!  Thunderbreath Gobbleguts, that is!  Where else do you find dwarfs and elves served?  Jellied herd-man!  Batter-fried pixies!  And, the ever popular trollkin burger!  (And nothing like a side of Ladyfingers to whet the appetite!)  And that's only the meals... generous mugs of ail, blear, whine, and Powzie! are all available.  And for those with a real thirst, you can get your favorite beverage served in a giant skull bowl (fully edible!).  

There's an unofficial branch of that popular troll eatery in Casino Town, opens at dusk. Thunderbreath's offers the crude but entertaining after-dinner betting game from the Shadow Plateau, “Pull my Finger” (a real favourite of Harrek the Berserk when he visited in 1618).

[KeithN]

Here's a dumb theory I just came up with: 

Sun Count Skindilli Longlegs was really a River guy - Sun Count Ingilli, mispronounced. That's how he succeeded in the River Ritual. 

 

[scott-martin]

[Richard S.]

10 minutes ago, scott-martin said:

I raise you Argrath Arkat

[jajagappa]

Another thread reminded me of another dumb theory of mine:  Talor the Laughing Warrior is really Taylor from Planet of the Apes.

[dumuzid]

10 minutes ago, jajagappa said:

Talor the Laughing Warrior is really Taylor from Planet of the Apes.

You'd need quite the heroquest to retrieve him after the ending of Beneath the...

[Sir_Godspeed]

Umath didn't "drive his parents apart": he was the manifestation of their orgasmic sigh/breath/cry, hence his energetic virility. The reason why Sky and Earth split was because they needed to "have a moment" after what was clearly quite the lay. 

[Austin]

6 hours ago, Sir_Godspeed said:

The reason why Sky and Earth split was because they needed to "have a moment" after what was clearly quite the lay.

You might even say it shook the heavens and the earth. (Sorry-not-sorry.)

[John Biles]

7 hours ago, dumuzid said:

You'd need quite the heroquest to retrieve him after the ending of Beneath the...

I think that the Lightbringer's Quest would definitely suffice to summon Taylor.

"That damn dirty Arkat!  He blew it all up!"

[MOB]

 @Jeff posted this in the RuneQuest FB group:

Quote

Here's neat comparison of mountains in Dragon Pass by the amazing Matt Ryan that is being done as part of another project.

to which Matthew Cole commented as follows:

Quote

Just sayin ;o

 

[John Biles]

The 'Is Orlanth's LBQ a failure' thread made my brain think about the world where the quest is actually Orlanth's BBQ, where he makes food so good, it brings Yelm and Ernalda back to life because they can smell it in the underworld.

I suppose Orlanthi favor a more vinegary barbeque sauce while Pelorians want a sweeter one.

 

[Sir_Godspeed]

2 minutes ago, John Biles said:

The 'Is Orlanth's LBQ a failure' thread made my brain think about the world where the quest is actually Orlanth's BBQ, where he makes food so good, it brings Yelm and Ernalda back to life because they can smell it in the underworld.

I suppose Orlanthi favor a more vinegary barbeque sauce while Pelorians want a sweeter one.

 

Yelm couldn't handle Orlanth's spicy rub.

[Leingod]

More a silly headcanon than a theory: Every elemental Rune has a particular method of unarmed combat attached to it, and for Earth that's grappling, which is why Earth deities and worshipers tend to be excellent wrestlers. Barntar is acknowledged as the best wrestler of the Thunder Brothers, for instance, but that's because he's favored by his mother's side of the family and was taught some of their secret wrestling moves by his mother and aunts.

(I don't really have anything in mind for the others, except that Darkness gods and worshipers are definitely scrappers who see nothing wrong with biting and scratching; it's a rare fistfight between Uz that doesn't end in someone getting an ear bitten off).

On 7/6/2020 at 7:16 PM, John Biles said:

The 'Is Orlanth's LBQ a failure' thread made my brain think about the world where the quest is actually Orlanth's BBQ, where he makes food so good, it brings Yelm and Ernalda back to life because they can smell it in the underworld.

I suppose Orlanthi favor a more vinegary barbeque sauce while Pelorians want a sweeter one.

 

Now that makes me imagine the story of Amaterasu hiding herself in a cave and the gods having a loud party to entice her out of hiding, but with Yelm and the Lightbringers.

[Ian Absentia]

I'm going to cross-post this idea from the Babeester Gor and the Elves thread.

My theory (apparently borne out explicitly in other, more hostile Aldryami realms) is that the "rootless" elfs, by breaking away from their stable communities, are effectively cut off from the sustenance of the Earth.  As a result, they have to procure their own means of sustenance, but out of deference to Aldrya they abstain from harming plant life for food and drink, making them strict carnivores and eating all meat-beings they kill.  Rather than being aberrations from Aldryami society and culture as we've long been told, they are the mulching process of Aldrya and an integral part of the Growing Way.

So trolls aren't the only ones who get in on the cannibalistic fun.

Please note: Mostali are NOT meat-beings.  They require special mulching processes.  The trolls call this "marination".

[Thanks to The Elder Scrolls for inspiration.]

!i!

Edited July 11, 2020 by Ian Absentia
Beester!

[jajagappa]

1 hour ago, Ian Absentia said:

Mostali are NOT meat-beings.  They require special mulching processes.

For the aldryami, I'd see this as part of Growth as they slowly dissolve, eat away, and breakup Stone with their roots.  And clearly one of the reasons the Mostali are so virulently opposed to Elf Forests.  But without their "roots", the rootless elves may not be able to process dwarfs at all in this fashion.  They may simply Hate Mostali out of cultural heritage, or do so because they blame the dwarfs for making them rootless, or possibly they just become ambivalent towards them.

[Ian Absentia]

1 hour ago, jajagappa said:

They may simply Hate Mostali out of cultural heritage, or do so because they blame the dwarfs for making them rootless, or possibly they just become ambivalent towards them.

Passion: Hate (Mostali - flavor)

!i!

[Lordabdul]

Ok here's one of my dumb theories (apologies if it has already been stated): She Who Waits is really the Red Goddess herself. She's cyclical in more ways than we know, and cycles through Time, helping create herself after she is brought down from the sky, repeating the cycle. In some ways, she's as trapped in Time as the other deities are in the God Time.

Edited July 16, 2020 by lordabdul

[Sir_Godspeed]

Inspired by a certain other thread I cooked up this (almost certainly wrong) alternate take:

Nysalorean missionaries Illuminated Arkat, robbing him of his comfortable place in the cosmos, sending him on a rampage to destroy Nysalor's illuminating efforts forever. Arkat took Illumination... badly. He stared into the Void, and the Void stared back into him. Better for the world to live a lie than to subject it to the bleak, empty truth that renders everything null. 
 
If you meet Buddha on the road, kill him. 

(Literally.)

Edited July 16, 2020 by Sir_Godspeed

[Qizilbashwoman]

1 hour ago, Sir_Godspeed said:

Inspired by a certain other thread I cooked up this (almost certainly wrong) alternate take:

Nysalorean missionaries Illuminated Arkat, robbing him of his comfortable place in the cosmos, sending him on a rampage to destroy Nysalor's illuminating efforts forever. Arkat took Illumination... badly. He stared into the Void, and the Void stared back into him. Better for the world to live a lie than to subject it to the bleak, empty truth that renders everything null. 
 
If you meet Buddha on the road, kill him. 

(Literally.)

the hilarious thing is that isn't the actual canon probably that he got illuminated by getting ganked and being too mean for it to stick the first time? after that first rebirth he just skipped around faiths like it didn't matter, which is... you know... not a thing

[scott-martin]

Some nations we now classify as "human" were liberated alongside more distinctive Jolanti forms and live mostly among us today, enriching our bloodlines and technological capabilities.

[Nevermet]

Oh, I like that idea... that lots of humans didn't start as human before the Dawn.  The Hsunchen are like this, but there's no reason there can't be other groups.

[davecake]

On 7/17/2020 at 6:17 AM, Qizilbashwoman said:

the hilarious thing is that isn't the actual canon probably that he got illuminated by getting ganked and being too mean for it to stick the first time?

My understanding is that he was Illuminated before everything really started up, by elves in Brithos, as a youth. 

On 7/17/2020 at 6:17 AM, Qizilbashwoman said:

after that first rebirth he just skipped around faiths like it didn't matter, which is... you know... not a thing

HIs first betrayal was leaving the Brithini for become a Hrestoli Man-Of-All, which (barring the possibility he was briefly killed and as resurrected etc) happened long before his first true death attacking Kartolin. While a terrible betrayal by Brithini standards, I don't think they have spirits of reprisal or anything. Of course, he gave up immortality for it. 

[Akhôrahil]

30 minutes ago, davecake said:

My understanding is that he was Illuminated before everything really started up, by elves in Brithos, as a youth. 

This is so interesting - it shows that Elves already had a somewhat independent tradition of Illumination. Picked up from pre-Nysalor Solar connections?